I don’t know if it’s true, or if it’s just something old people say, but I’ve been told there was a time when there was such a thing as decorum. When some topics were just understood to be private, and people’s mothers taught them some level of common decency. I know I said I wanted to use my time machine to eat cheese with my poodle in 1960’s Paris, but I think I’d be happy to just go back to a time when people pretended they weren’t icky and kept their mouths shut (maybe 1960’s Paris is that place). I don’t buy the whole argument that things that are natural are fair game. If there’s a good reason to share your story (say to make a friend feel more secure about his bodily functions, or ease a woman’s fears about childbirth if you’ve gone through it) then fine, just keep it between you and your friend. If you just inexplicably like to share your grossities with strangers, please please please don’t. I spent today repeatedly increasing the volume on my iPhone to block out the oft-repeated story my coworker was telling of her dental visit this morning. Don’t worry, I won’t tell you what she said, but let’s just say she said it loudly and it was unpleasant. Also (now this is a biggie and it might get to be a tad hypocritical as I am going to mention specific offenses) would you please stop posting things on Facebook that make my stomach turn? Those things include but are not limited to toenail fungus, pimples, rashes, other bodily functions, and pictures of things you’ve peed on/the inside of your uterus…even if there’s a very special fetus in there. It’s a fetus. It’s not cute yet.
Sorry for the rant, but I reached my limit today.